see through

Back in 2008, I asked, where is permanence.
Today I ask the same question again. Everyday we make different choices, leading to different directions and we end up being in some places else we never thought we'd ever be in.
We've all had moments where we take a step back just to ponder and reflect how far we've come, or rather just how different things are.

Do you regret them? Do you ever wish to yourself that if only things and everyone else stayed the same when they were all just good enough, you'd never have to bear more hardships and heartaches. If only we were all happy enough with what we had, never wanting more, never looking for more, we'd never take another step forward from where we were previously standing.

Today, I witness the burial of a dear 9 year-old loyal and loving dog, 3 feet under. Together with weeping eyes and grieving faces, we all think, if only there was permanence.

People come and go, in and out of your life. We all do, as we wish. But really, everything in between is just kept silent because we all know that really, only less than a handful stays with you.

They say it takes losing something to truly appreciate it. Why can't we all play a role of permanence so we'll never have to lose to learn.

Why mold us that way.

Always too many questions to everything and too few answers to anything at all.

5 days into the new year now; cheers to more excitement, new challenges and less permanence :)

Because I still believe, that in spite of everything good and bad, change is for the better.

MOVIE ANYONE?

*update*

Tuesday 24th November, Movie outing anyone?
This is to Sharon, Yeewen, Chaiyin, Maesi, Becca, Aishah, Marina, Jaymi.
And to those who always finds it hard to make it is also included, ChiaJean and Loosin.
I think i didn't miss out anyone.

Where else if its not Aeon. Have lunch first bout 12pm then movie about 2ish 3.
YES or NO, have the courtesy to tell.


-ping

Back in 2007

i still remember how much we cried on our graduation.
and i still cant believe that we actually cried. lol we cried!
ahh, it's been 2 years already.
i miss school!!!
i miss my big blue uniform!
i miss school! every moment spent there. even the exam period.

I dont feel anything when i go back to MGS anymore!
it's so different now.
and pn.chua retired?! she was so entertaining! lol
no la, she was a very nice teacher. really
i misss herrr! and mr.choo! and the teacher who wears her bf's shirt to school!
i wanna cry.
k la, i go cry now.

I need a miracle

So.... right now, I have 1758 words on Word and it needs to be cut down to 1000, or at most, 1100. I don't even know why I'm here blogging because I really have nothing to say.

It's 6.10 am and I've been up for uh, quite a while. Juggling 3 assignments at a time, but in my case, I decided on only two. But whatever.

One random question: Is it true that your fingers are smaller at night than they are during the day?

Secondhand Serenade's playing on iTunes and it's taking me back to high school.
I'm wasting time, am I not.

GAH. HOW TO CUT DOWN THAT MANY WORDS!? ITS LIKE FREAKING IMPOSSIBLE LAR.

Bye.

i finished ONE assignment! 8 more to go! wee~~

our friday nights like "semakin tak jadi" d hor.
it's like becoming an obligation.
but as long as we're still comfortable with each other!
and i'll try very hard not to come late okay?? ahahah
dont scold me here okay. give me face here la.. LOL
but dunno anyone will be visitting this blog or not also.
i wanna get scolded by u guys here also quite susah la. tsk

can i post where we'll be going n time all here every friday? haha.
save money.

-ywen-

It's only life-Kate voegele

Tears are forming in your eyes,
a storm is warning in the skies,
the end of the world it seems,
you bend down and you fall on your knees,
well get back on your feet ,

yeah,don't look away,
don't run away,
baby it's only life,
don't lose your faith,
don't run away,
it's only life.

you were always playing hard,
never could let down your guard,
you can't win,
if you never give in,
to that voice within,
saying pick up your chin,
baby let go of it ,

yeah,don't look away,
don't run away ,
baby, it's only life.
don't lose your faith,
don't run away,
baby it's only life.

take your hesitance,
and your self defense,
leave them behind,
it's only life,
don't be so afraid of facing every day,
just take your time,
it's only life,
i'll be your stepping stone,
don't be so alone,
just hold on tight,
it's only life,

don't look away,
don't run away,
baby it's only life,
don't lose your faith,
don't run away,
baby, it's only life


it's only life, it's only life,don't look away...

Buses and Trains

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I wanna do it again

What I hate people do (and I do)

I hate it when I'm dragged into your issues.

I hate you for making me the middleman between you.

I hate you for laughing at me when I'm being serious.

I hate you for rubbing into my face of what I don't have.

I hate you for turning things around and making yourself sound like the victim.

I hate having to ask you.

I hate myself for the way I deal with problems. Which is by not dealing with it at all.

I hate myself for resorting to temporary highs to get over it.

I hate myself for not feeling.

And lastly,

I hate that I have so many things to hate.

Anyway-Martina McBride

You can spend your whole life building
Something from nothin'
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway

You can chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway

God is great
But sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anywayI do it anyway

This world's gone crazy
It's hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway

You can love someone with all your heart
For all the right reasons
In a moment they can choose to walk away
Love 'em anyway

God is great
But sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway

Yea - I do it anyway

You can pour your soul out singing
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yea, sing it anyway

Yeah, yeah!

I sing
I dream
I love anyway

too close for comfort

... and so, it is like that one song you fall in love with. That one song you come across by chance. Then, it becomes that one song you choose not to listen to over and over again, just so you will never get tired of it.

But then again, it is on repeat.

Only to realize, that you can listen to it over and over again. All day long, all week, all year round even. Anytime, at any given day. And find that it never grows old. You say, it feels like heaven.

Serendipity, they say.

I, simply just never want to face the truth.

<3

The Cinema Experience

I was just remembering the cinema incident and thought of blogging about it. Remember how traumatizing it was sharon and cy??

Anywayy, cy, sharon and me went to watch Paul Blart: Mall cop awhile back at bukit tinggi cinema. Because cy came late, we all ended up getting seats near the front. And we had the corner area, so cy sat next to the aisle, sharon in the middle with me on her left. When I turned to see who was sitting on the other side of me, I saw two small boys. While the trailers were going on, this little buggers got up and went in front and exchanged their seats with two big buggers. So now I had 2 big nuts next to me. Everything was going fine.

Until one of the buggers next to me SUDDENLY bursts out laughing explosively. Right after that, another idiot laughs even louder at the other side of the cinema. Hearing that, my seat mate gives out another bellowing noisy laugh. This goes on.

They were having a FUCKING LAUGHING COMPETITION. Right in the middle of a public cinema.

The first time he laughed, I nearly jumped out of my seat in shock. I looked at Sharon, her mouth open with popcorn falling. And the 2nd time he did it, I was getting annoyed already.

Immediately after that, he leans towards me and whispers "Eh you mind ah, if i laugh like this loud? Can ah?"

WTF U WANT ME TO SAYYY???? OF CORSE I MIND LA U BLOODY JAKUN!!!

But i just kept calm and said "It be better if you didn't".
"Oh yessar? Sorry sorry". And then he comes even closer and offers his bucket of popcorn to me (as a peace offering??). I decline and he practically comes on top of my lap to offer Sharon, whose next to me, the popcorn. Sharon just turns away. And he continues holding the damn popcorn until I push it away and say "It's ok. We already have popcorn".

Do u see how civilised I am to crazy nutjobs like this??

So we continue watching our movie. Since it was a comedy, every friggin second was punctuated with those idiots competing with each others laughing volume. I could hear cy, beside sharon, going Shhhh Shhhhh! But obviously, such kampung ppl don't understand stuff like this.

And then later on, as I lift my ice lemon tea from the holder to drink, the idiot immediately grabs his drink and holds it up towards me.
"Cheers!!" he announces brightly.
Walawehhh, how tak tahu malu can u be? He continues to wait for my response so I quickly touch my drink to his and mutter cheers.

When the movie was over, cy, sharon and me jump out of our seats and run out of the cinema.

Like a glass vase

Ugh. I feel so disappointed with myself. As it is, it's already so hard to earn my parents confidence in me and I so carelessly and stupidly broke that trust. I don't know how long its gonna take to redeem myself in their eyes again. Sigh.

ps: Sharonnnnn! how ur parents trust u to go out even after u break ur curfew sooo many times?? haha

tick tock

To live your life with true meaning, or to just sweep off challenges life throws at you because complacency becomes a big part of you that moving forward and making a difference seem like a thousand miles away.


"It's alright to lose yourself sometimes, it's just how you find what makes you, you again."

What is that one thing you would never compromise with, that one thing you will want to leave behind once life sweeps you off its course?


What is your one true purpose in life?

I found me again

You know, sometimes, being the heartless, selfish bitch can be the best thing that ever happened to you. You don’t get yourself in a situation where your emotions are strongly involved so you rarely get hurt. And that saves you helluva lot of pain and trouble.

And just say you decide to open up for once, and you end up getting hurt, but you know you can easily move on. Just like that line from Kanye’s single Stronger; “That don’t kill me, can only make me stronger”. So you made a mistake. Everyone does. But you learn from your past experiences knowing that you have the power to change what happens next.

And there are always going to be losers who’ll try to cause problems for you just to defend their ego. But why care what they think? You don’t change who you are just to fit in. You own your life, you don’t live it for others. So go ahead and set your standards high and don’t compromise your principles for anyone. When you know you deserve more, don’t settle for anything less. Don’t ever undermine your self-worth cause you are and always will be perfection.

you make it real-james morrison

it's been so long since we last have 'pillow talk'.

i think we should have sleepovers!

i miss those times...!

you all made me realise something so important that i've long forgotten.

-ywen-

Here I come again!

I'm gonna start like this,

Do you people know who I am? I'm not gonna insert my name at the bottom of the post but I think some knows it's me. It's been really really long and I just drop by to put some live into this blog we built many years ago.

Coming to think of the past, I think I kinda miss it. The times where we sneak out of the backdoor and run to canteen, or toilet, or someone elses class just to skip that bloody subject that is sooo boring, or even order McD and eat at the back of the class. But right now in college, you don't wanna miss anything the lecturer has to say because every single thing is important, agree?







The days when Sharon and Jay had short hair. Haha!


Then now, we all feel "grown up" and we miss our past! Just like that, many many years have past and now we are nineteen!



Friendship will never die, but will real ones live till the end? That's what we will want to find out!

=)

viva forever

we're all grown up and changed.

changed in so many ways!

in a good or bad way i dont know la

but we're all grown up. and changed. =)

-guess who-

Broken Strings-James Morrison and Nelly Furtado

I couldnt help myself, I had to post this. I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE this song. It's so deep and I can actually relate to it. Well, just to some parts la haha :D

Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again
But you broke me, now I can't feel anything
When I love you , it's so untrue
I can't even convince myself
When I'm speaking it's the voice of someone else

(pre-chorus)
Oh, it tears me up
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much
I tried to forgive but it's not enough
To make it all okay

(chorus)
You can't play on broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real
Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?

Oh, what are we doing?
We are turning into dust
Playing house in the ruins of us
Running back through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When it's too late, too late

(pre-chorus)

(chorus)

But we're running through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When we both know it's too late, too late

You can't play on broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real
Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
So how can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?
Oh, you know that I love you a little less than before


Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again

PISSED!




PISSED!!!!



PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!! (cant the font get larger than this???)



ughhh. bad mood. sorryyyy

-bex-

*big silly grin*

call me random, but i suddenly had this urge to just say....




I LOVE ALL OF YOU GIRLS SO VERY MUCH!

*big wet sloppy kisses*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

aduh.